The Opposite of Love
Love is a hot topic and it seems everything around us focuses on the theme of love. We have holidays, shapes, and caricatures that represent love and a constant barrage from the media about romanticism and love. We even have a dedicated TV channel showing inspirational, yet mostly unrealistic love stories 24/7. What is the definition of true love? People so often think of love and hate as opposites, however, another strong opposite of love is actually indifference.
The antonyms (opposites) of love in the dictionary are apathy, casualness, complacency, disinterestedness, disregard, or unconcern for others. Take a look at the apathy which is defined as a lack of feeling, emotion, interest, or concern. At the extreme, it’s hate.
The dilemma is most people don’t mind saying they’re indifferent towards someone, but they won’t admit they hate them. So why does society accept indifference when it’s in the same family of feelings as apathy/hate and avoidance of that person.
I used to travel extensively for work and vividly remember one particular business trip. I was leaving my hotel room extremely late for a meeting when I looked down the hall and saw a housekeeper. I sensed that still, small voice of God tell me to give her whatever money I had in my wallet, and more importantly to tell her that she was loved.
While I didn’t know her circumstances, God did. I looked at my watch and glanced back down the hall where the frail woman stood almost hidden by the huge cart. So, I did what some people do in an awkward situation and tried to play out the conversation in my mind. It would be weird to approach a stranger with God’s message of love and give her money? What would she think of me? What business was it of mine what her current situation might be? I had a job to do and my boss was waiting. This was inconvenient plus it made me uncomfortable. Excuses came one after the other making it easy to justify my position. It was easy to default to indifference since I didn’t know her or what she was going through. Personally, I didn’t feel the sting of her situation since she was a stranger. Indifference provided me a way out.
I slipped away in the opposite direction, but it gnawed at me all day. Not only did I ignore her, but I missed an opportunity to be obedient to God and bless her – to be His hands and feet. I missed seeing the joy she might have felt at knowing her Creator cared so much.
The next day I got up early so I could try to find that same housekeeper to do what I should have done the previous day. I searched and searched and waited as long as I could, but I never saw her again. Time forced my hand and I checked out of the hotel to return home. Guilt and regret traveled with me. God gave me a chance to be part of his work and I had been too busy - indifferent.
Human nature is the same in every generation. What does the Bible say about indifference? In the book of Luke 10: 25-37, the Samaritan story perfectly describes indifference, even back in Biblical times.
On one occasion an expert in the law stood up to test Jesus. “Teacher,” he asked, “what must I do to inherit eternal life?” What is written in the Law?” he replied. “How do you read it?” He answered, “‘Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength and with all your mind’; and, ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’” “You have answered correctly,” Jesus replied. “Do this and you will live.” But he wanted to justify himself, so he asked Jesus, “And who is my neighbor?”
In reply, Jesus said: “A man was going down from Jerusalem to Jericho when he was attacked by robbers. They stripped him of his clothes, beat him and went away, leaving him half dead. A priest happened to be going down the same road, and when he saw the man, he passed by on the other side. So too, a Levite, when he came to the place and saw him, passed by on the other side.
But a Samaritan, as he traveled, came where the man was; and when he saw him, he took pity on him. He went to him and bandaged his wounds, pouring on oil and wine. Then he put the man on his own donkey, brought him to an inn and took care of him. The next day he took out two denarii and gave them to the innkeeper. ‘Look after him,’ he said, ‘and when I return, I will reimburse you for any extra expense you may have.’ “Which of these three do you think was a neighbor to the man who fell into the hands of robbers?” The expert in the law replied, “The one who had mercy on him.” Jesus told him, “Go and do likewise.”
Scripture tells us because the injured man was not the same religion or from the same region, the men were easily indifferent. They actually went out of their way by crossing the road to the other side. Out of sight, out of mind. These men both left him there to die.
Let’s face it, we live in a busy society. If we see a car on the side of the road with a flat tire, how often do we stop and help change the tire or wait with that person until help arrives? Some of our excuses can include, “Surely, someone else will see them and help.” Maybe we might shrug it off saying, “It is none of my business or this isn’t a good part of town.”
God doesn’t just focus on love - He is a God of action. Our action is a choice. Most of the time helping will be inconvenient, cost us money, time or effort. However, if we say we love Christ, then we must also love our neighbor. As Scripture shows, God defines our neighbor not as the person who lives next-door, but as a stranger to us. Do we question times when we may be self-absorbed and view how God might see things through His eyes?
What if we fought against feelings of complacency and instead towards being thoughtful and attentive to others? Can you imagine the world if we each took a few minutes daily to stand against indifference, listen for God’s promptings and help our neighbor?
Inspired by my friend Benni –
Diana